Jan 20, 2025
You have come to the point where you know you have to change your drinking – not just for Dry January, but for LIFE.
You can no longer ignore your inner worries about your health, your relationships and your ability to be the best version of yourself – present, connected, at peace with yourself and your past, and free from all your old feelings of anger, guilt and shame.
You long to stand in your true being – happy, fulfilled and authentic.
And you know that changing your drinking is key to living the life you desire and deserve.
So, you manage to stop, you manage a couple of days, a couple of months and you feel AMAZING, proud, happy and you think….’I’ve got this’
And then it all starts to slide away, your thoughts and feelings start to turn to alcohol, you start to turn towards alcohol, the fight begins, your power diminishes and you are back to where you were before, daily drinking, daily guilt, shame and totally confused…..do you recognise your drinking pattern here?
What happened? You were doing so well…what’s wrong with you?
I know there is nothing wrong with you.
And there is definitely no mystery around why you are falling back into the same old ways of non-coping with alcohol….
Here’s the truth and the answer you need to hear.
Stopping drinking is just the beginning of your journey. It’s a wonderful, empowering first step, but stopping is not enough for you to stay sober for life.
Because a sober life isn’t just about not being drunk.
There is a broader spectrum to drinking, that takes it from problem, to social……
It’s about not needing a drink. It’s the difference of being in control or out of control.
Living sober is about being in total control of your choices. It’s about drinking differently, enjoying a couple of glasses with dinner or friends on a special social occasion, and then switching to something non-alcoholic with grace and ease.
Staying sober is about recognising the difference between an easy social drink, and the out-of-control desires alcohol you feel at other times, when not have a drink just isn’t going to happen.
To live a happy, healthy sober life, you must first accept your drinking habit for what it is, something you have done habitually at certain times (after work is a great example), and the battle in your mind over I must / I mustn’t drink, that is the driver of your habit.
And then its about the wonderful, life changing process of re-connecting with yourself, your deeper unmet needs and the thoughts, feelings and understanding the beliefs you hold (just for now), that alcohol will ease the void created by your learnt self-neglect.
I know from my own experience of regaining total control of my drinking, after 29 years of no control, that the more you take responsibility for discovering your deeper unmet needs;
Maybe your needs for comfort, relaxation, peace.
Or your physically neglected needs for healthy food, good hydration,
Or your emotional needs such as connection, forgiveness, acceptance, joy, and love,
And then the responsibility for meeting those needs, the easier staying on your sober pathway is.
When you know what your true needs are and act on them consistently, you will quickly feel your mind and body fall into its natural, born to experience, rhythm of your life.
In that rhythm, you will automatically start to fill your inner void with what you truly need, and when you do that, alcohol becomes a lovely social glass of something special, and not the panacea that ultimately makes your life so much worse, and you think, feel and drink completely differently.
Your sober life is for you to define. No-one lives your life, no-one ever truly knows your needs. Its up to YOU.
And the truth is, you always have the power to change your drinking, to release old habits, and to take full responsibility for your well-being, and when you do, your drinking and life will change magically.
If you are ready to change your drinking and embark on the most joyful and rewarding journey of your life, let’s talk, you can book your COMPLIMENTARY Take Back Control of Your Drinking Call, HERE.
I’ve done the walk, I know the path to alcohol freedom, and I know how to guide you back to a life of control, fulfilment and JOY.
Sonia Grimes
The Alcohol Control Coach
Jul 24, 2023
MidLIFE is the most exciting time of LIFE.
You have experience and wisdom that makes you more valuable than the most precious of gems.
And now is time for you to use everything you have learnt, to put you first and to live your LIFE, you way, on your terms.
So what DO you want more of?
Happiness, Peace of Mind, a new Career, Travel, flourishing Relationships?
I know that to fully experience your LIFE of Happiness, Fulfilment, Peace of Mind, Purpose and JOY, you have to know exactly what the LIFE you dream of looks like.
Because clarity on what your MidLIFE Dreams is, is the foundation of every step you take.
When you have clarity, you can consistently make decisions that move you forward quickly.
But without clarity, you stay in the sticky heavy mud of confusion, and your decisions making process lack the conviction you need to stay on track.
The truth is, what you wanted in your younger years, is not necessarily what your heart longs for now.
The world of ‘stuff’ – the house / car / expensive clothes, don’t have the same appeal, in MidLIFE, you are searching for more meaning to your LIFE.
To re-connecting with your truest self, who can never be found in ‘stuff’.
I know that to discover your MidLIFE Dream, you must take a deep dive into your inner world – the world that is so personal just to you, and exists, not in your external LIFE situations or circumstances, but in the world behind your eyes.
This is where all your LIFE Hopes, Filters, your Beliefs, your Strengths and Fears live.
This is where you have learnt to perceive LIFE, who you are, what you deserve and your level of Happiness, Health & HEALING.
But because you can’t ‘SEE’ your inner world, you can be very confused by yourself, your actions, your choices.
To help you start your deeply personal journey of creating your MidLIFE Dream, I have created my 20 Self-Discovery Questions to Living your MidLIFE Dream.
So, grab yourself a cup of tea, get yourself cosy, and start your Self-Discovery journey.
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- Describe how living my Dream MidLIFE dream LIFE Look, Sound and Feel like to me?
- How many weeks/months/YEARS have I wanted my LIFE to change?
- When was the last time I did something towards living my Dream MidLIFE that made me feel a little scared or uncomfortable?
- When I felt a little scared or uncomfortable, what did I DO to comfort myself?
- Did the ACTION I took move me powerfully or hesitantly forward towards my Dream MidLIFE?
- In what ways have I grown as a person in the last year?
- What do I need to Know, Trust and BELIEVE to be true about myself, that would allow me to ACT in ways that will take me, with confidence to my Dream MidLIFE?
- What RESOURCES do I need, what do I need to LEARN that would take me closer to my Dream MidLIFE?
- What am I doing on a daily/weekly/monthly/yearly basis to improve my MidLIFE?
- What does ‘failure’ mean to me?
- How do I REACT to perceived criticism?
- How does perceived criticism make me FEEL ?
- Does perceived criticism make me change my direction in LIFE?
- What needs to be in place for me to speak my TRUTH?
- What will happen if I DO take DAILY ACTIONS to move me forward to me Dream MidLIFE?
- What will happen if I DON’T take DAILY ACTIONS to move me forward to me Dream MidLIFE?
- Am I prepared to live less than I deserve?
- Am I prepared to take my unfulfilled Dream MidLIFE desires, to my grave?
- What SMALL step do I COMMIT to TODAY to move me forward?
- What will I say YES to NOW, that will make a difference TODAY?
NOTES; Re-read your answers and note down any common threads.
What do they mean? What do they tell you about the lens through which you see yourself and the DECISIONS you make when you think of living your Dream MidLIFE?
Share with me your thoughts
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Hi, I’m Sonia
The pain of my 28 years of alcoholism, crippling depressions, grief & binge eating, and the sudden peace and freedom I found, through new awareness’s, insights, and the simple tools within me that I didn’t even know existed, has become my purpose in creating powerful LIFE transformations for you, by taking you on a journey of Self-Discovery through Compassionate Self-Inquiry.
I know that you are only stuck in any area of LIFE because of what you BELIEVE to be true of yourself, your struggle and the world around you.
I also know that your BELIEFS are a Choice, and that Freedom, Happiness, Health & THRIVING are Choices too.
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I’m a happy mama, a spiritual searcher, dog lover, bad singer, avid reader and professionally, I wear two hats!
- Coaching MidLIFE Women to THRIVING, in the next chapters of LIFE, through my Happiness Code process, &
- Coaching women to Take Back Control of their drinking, through my Rapid Alcohol Recovery Process.
I coach my clients using a unique blend of Neuro Science, Practical Strategies & Spiritual Practices, and if you would like to know more about how I can help you, contact me HERE
Sonia x
