Jan 3, 2025
Are you ready to find true freedom from your exhausting daily cycle of drinking, guilt, and regret?
You long for peace of mind, to feel calm and confident in your choices, and to rediscover your authentic self. And you deserve to live that way.
But if you’ve been trying to change by focusing on alcohol—tracking drinks, setting rules, or wrestling with guilt—you’ve likely found that the success is only temporary (like Dry January) before slipping back into your old drinking habits, leaving you feeling worse because of your ‘failure’ to stick with it.
The truth is, when you try to change any problem by focusing solely on the problem—in this case, your drinking—it takes up more headspace, creating stress, anxiety, and confusion. And these are just some of the negative feelings that actually fuel your desire for a drink, rather than releasing it.
The harder you fight your thoughts and feelings around alcohol, the stronger the pull becomes.
The Truth About Alcohol and Your Struggle
In my personal experience of 29 years of no control over my drinking—feeling frightened, confused, and facing the effects every morning after—I’ve learned something profound: alcohol is not the problem that needs attention.
The real issue is the invisible Unconscious Beliefs that drive you back to drinking, over and over again.
It’s Not About What You Know; It’s About What You Believe
You probably already know that alcohol isn’t truly helping you relax, solve problems, or feel better. But knowing isn’t enough.
Your life actions, including your drinking, are guided by what you feel unconsciously, not what you know consciously.
If you believe that alcohol is your reward, your escape, or your way to cope, that belief will quietly but super-powerfully shape your choices. And you can’t see these beliefs—they operate beneath the surface, creating patterns of behavior that feel impossible to break.
But when you bring them into the light, the whole dynamic starts to shift.
Awareness Is the Key to Freedom
When you begin to see these Unconscious Beliefs clearly, something shifts. These are often described as ‘light bulb moments’, where you start noticing the patterns they create, even while you’re in them.
But now, instead of feeling overwhelmed or stuck, you feel empowered. You know what to do. You make the best choices for you, and it becomes as natural as breathing.
This is where real change happens—not by fighting against yourself, but by recognizing your Unconscious Beliefs and the patterns they run. It’s that simple.
When there’s no confusion and you can recognize your patterns as they arise, you’re free to make different choices.
You step out of the autopilot cycle with grace and ease. The stress, fear, and internal conflict fade away because you’re no longer fighting an unknown force.
The Answer Is Within You
Once you accept the truth that it’s not alcohol keeping you trapped, it’s the unknown parts of yourself—you are already on the path to freedom and powerful, easy change.
Now you are learning about the beliefs you haven’t yet uncovered that are the real barriers to change. And when you make the unknown known—when you see those beliefs for what they are—you can finally release them.
Imagine a Life Where You’re In Control
Imagine feeling calm and in control, choosing not to drink without stress or second-guessing yourself.
Imagine living with clarity, peace, and the confidence that you’re free to make decisions that truly serve you.
The journey isn’t just about regaining control of your drinking—it’s about creating a life that feels fulfilling, joyful, and authentic.
Alcohol loses its grip when you reconnect with who you are and understand the beliefs shaping your choices. It is as simple as that.
You don’t need to fight harder.
You need to see clearly. That’s where freedom begins. And once you find it, everything else falls into place.
Start Noticing the Patterns
Recognizing the patterns behind your drinking isn’t complicated. It begins with paying attention to your thoughts and feelings in the moments when you feel the urge to drink. These are the breadcrumbs that lead you to the Unconscious Beliefs driving your actions.
Here’s how you can start noticing your patterns:
🌟 Pause and Tune In
The next time you find yourself reaching for a drink, pause for a moment. Ask yourself: What am I feeling right now?
What am I hoping this drink will give me? You might notice feelings like stress, loneliness, boredom, or even frustration.
Perhaps you’re telling yourself, “I deserve this,” “This will help me relax,” or “I can’t deal with this right now without a drink.” These thoughts are clues to the deeper beliefs guiding your choices.
🌟 Look for Repetition
Notice when similar thoughts and feelings arise.Do you always crave a drink after a tough day at work? When you feel ignored or unappreciated? When you’re alone on a Friday night? These are patterns—not just in your actions but in the emotions and beliefs tied to those moments.
🌟 Question the Stories
Once you spot a pattern, gently question it. For example: Do I really need this drink to feel better?
Is this true, or is it just a habit I’ve fallen into?Even this small step of curiosity can start to loosen the grip of those Unconscious Beliefs.
Why You Need Support to Go Deeper
While these steps are a hugely valuable starting point, uncovering and shifting deeply ingrained Unconscious Beliefs requires a deeper process.
This is where I come in.
As The Alcohol Control Coach, I guide midlife women, like you, to uncover the Unconscious Patterns that have kept you trapped in a cycle of drinking, guilt, shame, and regret.
I teach you how to shine a light on the beliefs driving your actions and give you all the strategies that take you out of your drinking stress in the moment and help you reconnect with your authentic self—the calm, confident, and joyful person you know you’re meant to be.
Imagine Freedom from your Daily Drinking Habit
Imagine waking up each day with peace of mind, no longer battling the stress, guilt, and frustration of drinking.
Imagine the freedom to live a life where alcohol no longer controls you.
This isn’t about temporary fixes. This is about real, lasting change. And it’s possible for you.
Are you ready to make this change?
If you’re ready to change your drinking for life, reach out to me HERE today.
Let’s work together to break free from your daily drinking trap and begin your path to true happiness and healing.
Sonia Grimes
The Alcohol Control Coach
PS: Here’s what one client had to say about her transformation. Will you be next?
“I’ve been drinking a bottle of wine a night for years. I get home and the first thing I do is pour a glass of wine. None of my family believe my excuses anymore, and all of them hated my drinking.
Within two weeks of working with Sonia, my drinking had changed dramatically, and so have I. I feel peaceful, relaxed, and there’s no alcohol noise at all. I am loving the journey and the ease and calm at home. Sonia’s process works, and it has changed my life.”
Jan 4, 2022
Hello lovely….How are you?
Are you feeling full of excitement for your future, for the new, in-control-of-your-drinking, you?
Your new, no fear of relapse, you?
Your new no more struggling with Cravings or Willpower you?
How are you FEELING about not only smashing Dry January, but changing your drinking for the rest of the year, for LIFE?
If you are doing Dry January, well done you! You are probably already feeling prouder and better, physically and emotionally – its amazing how quickly you perk up isn’t it?
Maybe you are already feeling more energized, sleeping better, less bloated, skin looking better- and right now, in the early days, you may well be feeling very hopeful that this time you have got it…..but as the month wears on, the memories of other Dry January’s resurface, when you also felt hopeful and then inexplicably slid back in your old drinking patterns as the year wore on…..
You know at the very core of you that you want to make changes, and not just for January.
You know that you want to drink less consistently, to not feel out of control, and yet to still enjoy a social drink. You know you want to feel better, look better, ACT better…you know deep within you that your drinking isn’t who you are, you just don’t quite understand how to stay in the sober space when it is your heart’s desire……your heart’s desire to be the mother/partner/hell, even the dog owner, you and your loves deserve, and yet there is also a creeping feeling of ‘loss’ at the thought of changing the very thing you do, drink, that you know takes you further from YOU.
What on earth is going on?
The truth is, once Dry Jan is done and dusted, a yearly box so proudly ticked off, you don’t just start drinking again…..the actual drinking process starts when your THINKING have start to slip back on their well worn track of you having to control or deny yourself a drink….these thoughts take a great deal of fearful energy, which creates the feelings of anxiety and deprivation around what you perceive you will miss from alcohol.
Does that make sense?
However, if you weren’t buying into your alcohol THINKING you wouldn’t be creating any anxious FEELINGS.
Everything you do is through a process of Think, Feel, Re-Act – re-acting being the drowning the woman you love in alcohol.
Your drinking always, always, ALWAYS starts not with the first glass, but with the THINKING that creates the FEELINGS that result in the first glass to COMFORT those FEELINGS…and on to the second, and on to the daily bottle. This is the simple, always and forever TRUTH.
To give you an insight into how easy it is to let go of both the THOUGHTS and FEELINGS, that take you to drink, the feelings you misidentify as alcohol ‘cravings’, in one effortless step, here’s one of my easiest, and instant relief from alcohol cravings, LIFE Recovery Coach Tips
Notice the FEELINGS that come up, starting in your gut (they always start there), of fear, anxiety, around alcohol. This is the ONLY indication you need that your THINKING has slipped.
Next shift your awareness on to your THINKING – again, your thoughts are the creator of those feelings, NOT ALCOHOL
Notice WHO YOU ARE when these lower THOUGHTS come up – maybe you are tired, low, lonely, anxious about work/relationships, only you know.
And then use this oh, so, simple technique to let both the THOUGHTS and FEELINGS go, without even attempting to address/understand/rationalise anything to do with ALCOHOL.
- Create a PAUSE by,
- Changing your BREATHING
- INHALE through your nose for 5
- EXHALE through your mouth for 7
- Increase to an INHALE for 7
- EXHALE for 11
Do this for just 2 minutes and your alcohol cravings will simply disappear. I promise you, and if you have to do it 5 times in one hour, DO IT!
You are going to breath anyway, so CHOOSE the way you breathe…..It is as simple as that.
My clients enjoy huge success, through my uniquely simple and empowering 6 week Rapid Alcohol Recovery Method coaching process. Most clients who follow the process, make the biggest change from WEEK ONE.
A number of my clients have spent at least one term in Rehab and struggled in the ‘real’ world.
Other clients have come feeling that they felt they were close to losing everything and some who just didn’t want to drink / eat, on a daily basis, in a way they don’t like.
All of them, when they trust the process (me) and work the simple tools (you), have found the balance they desired and deserve. It will be the same for you too.
It doesn’t matter where you are now, or how long you have been struggling with your drinking, the peaceful way to LETTING GO is within you all the time x
If 2023 is YOUR time to put YOU first, to stop doing what you have always done (and getting the same sadder result), and to end your painful drinking struggle for LIFE, Contact me today.
Be kind and gentle with yourself
Sonia x
PS. If you would like to understand more about my journey from 28 years of alcoholism, to peaceful freedom, take a look at my internationally acclaimed book, This Isn’t Me (click on the link HERE), reviewed by Ranvir Singh of Good Morning Britain as “Beautiful & devastating”, wrote it for my son, as an apology for his younger years, and as an attempt to explain the un-explainable.
Nov 30, 2021
Hello lovely, its almost here……..
It’s almost the ‘season to be jolly’, the shops are full of Christmas cheer, of sparkles, Christmas carols, food and lot and lots of specially packaged for Christmas, alcohol……
Your dream is the same as last years, as it is every year, you want this to be the BEST Christmas.
And you know that as well as buying gifts, extra food, putting the tree, and the decorations up, you need, you must get a handle on your drinking…..
Because you remember last year, and the year before drink fest and all the stress, strain, exhaustion and pain that came with it, as well as maybe remembering the one year you didn’t drink and the pride, happiness and joy that came with that.
You know that changing your drinking will change your life….you may not know how much, but you know, completely, that life will be better if you weren’t ‘controlled’ by alcohol, and so you start to create a plan that will at the very least allow you to limit your drinking….because stopping seems a step to far…..
So, what is your new drinking plan? Specifically?
What have you decided to do differently this time?
And it has to be different, as the same old plan, brings the same old results, feeling a failure as you hide our wine glass and down the mints to hide your breath…..It can’t just have been me…..
Here’s the 3 keys you MUST have to create a successful plan……and none of them are about alcohol….
- What new AWARENESS’S do you have, not around alcohol – alcohol does not, cannot change – what it is one day, it is every day, so the only other part of your relationship you can look at for the answers is YOU?
- What new INSIGHTS do you have that have given you a sigh of relief because of what you now know?
- What new self-loving, effortless STRATEGIES to take you out of any stress of fear around alcohol, do you have ready for immediate use?
If you don’t have ALL of the above, with a structure and process that breathes with your life, darling, you don’t have a plan.
You may have a hope, a prayer, but not a plan you can lean into. Without a plan you don’t have clarity, and without clarity, there is no certainty, and sadly, you will always struggle to have the life of peace and freedom to choose around alcohol you long for and deserve.
If you don’t have ALL of the above, changing your drinking will be at best a ‘hit and miss’ exercise, with the emphasis firmly on the ‘miss’.
It is not enough to try harder, to try to be stronger, to use more willpower, (and my God you have tried over and over again), to try to distract yourself in the hope that your drinking will change. You may have some success, but sadly it will not, cannot last.
You can’t spend your life in vigilance around the ‘demon drink’, especially around the holiday seasons where so much more is expected of you (even if it’s just by you), when your self-care goes out the window, and self-neglect comes to stay……
The sad and simple truth is that you drink in a way you don’t like to offer yourself comfort, and the more exhausted, overwhelmed, under nourished you are, the greater your need for comfort… so following the dots…you are ultimately trying to be vigilant around not offering yourself comfort.
And so you drink more, not less……Another sad truth
However, I have a completely unique process to changing your drinking, my Rapid Alcohol Recovery Method….it is how I am simply sober, and in peace and ease after 28 years of alcohol struggle, and it is how my clients, the ones who have surrendered because they recognise that what they are doing to try to change their drinking has not /will not/CANNOT work…..and looked for something new, also have a peace and freedom around alcohol they didn’t believe was possible.
It is a 6 week process, and in less than 3 weeks, your drinking will change for life when you stop focussing on alcohol, and start to understand that the ONLY place your drinking struggle lies is in the BELIEF that it brings you comfort.
That BELIEF is why you feel fear, anxiety, missing out….NOT alcohol.
This Christmas could be your first in control of your drinking, or not drinking at all…..is there a greater gift you can give to yourself or your family?…..There hasn’t been to mine…
I have am offering a huge 50% discount for January – my heart tells me that this has been a hugely hard year for so many, and with all the rising costs, not much end in sight. And honestly, I don’t know how I would be coping if I was still drinking – I dread to think.
A life feeling out of control around alcohol is a half life, I know that, and you deserve better, your loves deserve better.
I am offering 10 clients this 50% offer, so please, put yourself FIRST.
Step up and out of what you have tried that has failed you, and give yourself and your family the greatest gift that Christmas and LIFE has to offer – you, happy, healthy and HEALED.
Contact me HERE to book a complimentary call
And always and forever, be very kind and gentle with YOU.
Sonia xx
PS. Here’s a client Testimonial
“One session in and I have had 2 glasses of wine that I choose to drink. 2 glasses lasted me all evening. I sipped them and I never sip wine! Other than that, no alcohol at all. I have no words. Thank you Sonia”
PPS. If you would like to understand more about my journey from 28 years of alcoholism, to peaceful freedom, take a look at my internationally acclaimed book, This Isn’t Me (click on the link HERE), reviewed by Ranvir Singh of Good Morning Britain as “Beautiful & devastating”, wrote it for my son, as an apology for his younger years, and as an attempt to explain the un-explainable.
Jun 9, 2021
Hello lovely, how is your week going?
Are you living in your present moment, (the only time you ever truly have), or is the energy you have to live your life of freedom from your drinking struggle, in the love and peace you deserve, divided between memories of your past and fears for your future?
Here’s the TRUTH of your problem drinking.
- You drink to COMFORT yourself
- To ease your PAIN of yesterday
- To ease your ANXIETIES of the future
- To BOOST you UP
- To CALM you DOWN – and so your list goes on……..
And you hate the lack of control you seem to have around your drinking, and try (again) to change it.
And it makes sense that because you hate the results of your drinking, that’s where you focus your ‘change’ on starting, because you know, alcohol is the ‘problem’
But it isn’t! The intention behind your drinking is always, always to take you out of pain and into peace.
The results of your drinking is, well you know this, a mountain of pain, shame and despair.
Your daily struggle with alcohol is the conflict between the intention (feelings) and the knowing (results). It has nothing to do with alcohol…..you drink to end the conflict of you.
And because you will always act on what you feel, alcohol becomes the problem, but it is not where your focus needs to be to change the way you drink……..
- You get the hangovers, because you drink
- You talk rubbish, because you drink
- You are emotionally unavailable to your children, because you drink.
- You feel weak and hopeless, because you drink
Yet your focus needs to be on your WHY of your drinking, which is always because you lack the very things you hope it will bring you……COMFORT (an umbrella term that covers everything that takes you out of alignment with you!).
That is where the simple answer to your drinking pain is, in your WHY you want/need/CRAVE a DRINK
And the easy answer to changing your drinking lies in truly knowing your WHY through new AWARENESS’S that allow for new actions, easily, that lead to the peaceful re-alignment of YOU
Do you recognise that?
So, what will you do with that recognition?
To help you start the process of AWARENESS of YOU, I have a simple Journal prompt I give to all my clients, it will help you too.
I want you to sit with this, quietly and write your heartfelt answers before you pick up the glass tonight. Breathe deeply, download and then ACT on your answer.
“For What Purpose Do I Want A Drink?”
Just 5 minutes to hear and understand your heartfelt answers before you pick up the glass tonight.
Those 5 minutes will give you insight, options and take you out of the stranglehold of your trapped thinking / cravings. It’s not hard, its NEW.
And in doing this simple exercise, you will start the real conversation about changing your drinking going!!
Be kind & gentle with yourself
Sonia xx
PS, to understand more about my process, here’s the link to my, 6 week Rapid Alcohol Recovery Method coaching process based on my own suddenly sober life, and through it, 100’s of women, have gone from desperate and feeling destroyed, to peace, freedom and joy.
Working with Sonia has transformed my life, not just my drinking, MY LIFE! I feel empowered, at peace with who I am and I know that whatever happens in life, I can deal with it, I don’t need alcohol. I just need me“
If you would like to understand more about my journey from 28 years of alcoholism, to peaceful freedom, take a look at my internationally acclaimed book, This Isn’t Me (click on the link HERE).I wrote it for my son, as an apology for his younger years, and as an attempt to explain the un-explainable.
Apr 29, 2021
How are YOU? Not your children, work, friends, family, YOU?
How are you feeling?
- Are you feeling comforted, balanced at peace?
- Do you feel safe in trust and alignment with yourself and the world/Universe – the bigger picture?
- Or do you feel shrunk in the ever tightening straight jacket of the stress and struggle of your drinking?
- Fearful of the ticking of the clock, as you edge towards your decided ‘Wine O’Clock’ that has become the awakening of your Cravings?
Ultimately, there are 2 ways of living around your drinking, in relaxed and in control, or struggle, stress and out of control.
Both of which are CHOICES only you can make, and the stress, struggle and out of control can be changed by simple new awareness’s that allow for effortless expansion of your perception of you, alcohol and LIFE.
In effortless expansion, you have a wider horizon, with space for greater opportunities, greater choices for thoughts/feelings and the consequences of these two, the ACTIONS you take – to drink, to not drink, to not drink with ease, to fight to not drink.
Alcohol doesn’t change. It can’t. Take that one simple FACT on board, and shift your attention from the external (alcohol), and gently look at the only part of your ‘relationship’ with alcohol that can change, YOU.
Here’s are FOUR Simple Steps to help you on your journey to you, and to finding PEACE around alcohol.
- RECOGNIZE the feelings that come up when you crave a drink – you drink on what you feel, not on what you think
- OBSERVE the thoughts that created the feelings
- DETACH from those thoughts – the less you engage with your thoughts, the weaker your feelings. To do this, when your ‘drinking thinking’ pops up, say with non-judgmental kindness, “Hi, you’re here again, I don’t need you, off you go now” – this alone creates a gap between you and your thinking that loosens your alcohol thinking/feeling/Craving trap
- PRAISE yourself – every time you use the above and don’t drink – your praise of you activates your LOVE of you, the most powerful emotion and in LOVE there is no desire for alcohol.
And it is ALL down to you! It is YOUR (not someone else’s), kind words, towards you, that create the most powerfully kind feelings and kind feelings mean you don’t drink!
Changing your drinking is NOT hard.
Battling with your painful THOUGHTS and FEELINGS/CRAVINGS IS – this is the mental torture you inflict on yourself, as you attempt to make yourself ‘feel better’ by not drinking.
Alcohol is what you ‘DO’ to end that torture.
As long as you continue to try over and over again, to change your drinking, by starting with any attempt to deny yourself your ‘comfort’, by beating yourself up for you ‘weakness’, and not turning instead to gently learning the self-loving truths about who you are and what you need, you will get the same results….’failure’
When you start your journey to freedom, by looking into you, into the wonder and magic of you – a wonder and magic you have learnt to believe no longer exists, your drinking will change, effortlessly.
If my words resonate, I can help you. The hardest part of change through my 6 week, Rapid Alcohol Recovery Method process, is the reaching out.
The holding out of your hand and placing it in mine. Until you are your rock, I will be. My journey to changing my drinking has been the joy of my LIFE, don’t you deserve that too?
Be kind and gentle with yourself
Sonia xx
PS. If you would like to understand more about my journey from 28 years of alcoholism, to peaceful freedom, take a look at my internationally acclaimed book, This Isn’t Me (click on the link HERE).I wrote it for my son, as an apology for his younger years, and as an attempt to explain the un-explainable.
