How do you feel in the face of your favourite tipple or dessert? Do they call to you, tempting you from your straight and narrow, leaving you helpless in the face of their ‘charms’? Or can you take them or leave them – a little bit of what you fancy is fine, after all.
So many of us feel that we have no control over our drinking and/or rubbish eating. And whilst the results of either may differ – we are unlikely to leap into bed with a stranger after a cheesecake binge, or embarrass ourselves in ridiculous arguments – the gifts of alcohol.
Nor are we likely to feel the constipation of our rubbish eating habits, after quaffing a bottle of wine, as we sit at our desks, the way we do when we demolish a packet of biscuits /bars of chocolate, and literally feeling the weight pile on.
So, whilst the consequences of our eating and drinking may differ in the small print, the reasons WHY we partake of both don’t. Ever.
And that is where my Recovery Coaching comes in. I don’t deal with the consequences, I don’t need too. They are not a mystery, we see them, and we feel them – and as we slip completely into the panic of our eating and drinking, so does everyone else.
I remember, so painfully clearly, sitting in my car, driving to an out of town shop to buy vodka. My hands were gripping the steering, sweating and I was terrified of the war that was going on inside me. It felt it was in every part of my body. I was in a state of total, uncomprehending panic. It felt as though a black haze was in me. I feel like crying as I write this. I genuinely thought I was going in mad.
The tug of war (and those words are so banal in comparison to the way I was feeling at that time), was completely beyond my understanding. And the more I tried to reason, beg myself, the stronger the pull of alcohol became, and I gave in. Again. I was defeated by my own thinking.
Does this resonate with you? Do you recognise your inner battle? I know it is the same with food because I was also a binge eater/purger, and because of where I am now and what I understand, am aware of, as to what the hell was going on.
We drink and eat the things we don’t want to eat and drink, for one reason and one reason only. We want to feel better.
And the less ‘better’ we feel, the more we try to stop doing what we believe on some level makes us feel better (and it did at one time, or we wouldn’t believe it), the stronger the pull becomes. The more brutal our inner war becomes, the more likely we are to give in and ‘indulge’. We have to find relief. We have too.
I am so happy and relieved to say that the panic I had around food and alcohol has gone. That I know what feeling ‘better’ actually means and how to deliver it to myself, and now you.
It is not about ‘doing’ something/anything more, in our overstretched, stressed lives, it is about ‘being’ more. Being emotionally aware and offering the ‘selfs’ that are missing from our lives – self-love, self-comfort, self-care and so many more.
It is the lack of understanding of our needs, of ‘self’, that causes us pain, not the food and not the drink. They are simply the brutal, uncaring ways we try to innocently ignore our true needs and how to gift them to us. We don’t mean to hurt ourselves, or our loved ones, we just don’t understand the reality of what is happening in our inner world.
I don’t believe there is one person who reads this, that won’t understand my writing. You may not accept it for now, but it is the absolute truth.
My mission is to take as many wonderful women on the incredible journey of self-understanding that will set you free with confidence and ease, to the place of peace I know exists for all of you. It is where I am now, and it is our human design.
If you are ready to step up today, and make the changes you deserve, contact me. Don’t wait. We all have one shot at life, lets make it the best one it can be.
One last point, we are all doing our best, always. We just have lost sight of how to achieve it.
Love & respect
If you would like to know a little bit more about me, take a look at my About Sonia page.
I am also the author of “This Isn’t Me“, the story of my personal journey through both drug and alcohol addiction, and then finally and thankfully, into recovery.
Location is never a problem, I offer 1-2-1 Consultations, via Telephone & Zoom.