The FIRST Step to Powerful, Easy Change is……

The FIRST Step to Powerful, Easy Change is……

For most of my adult life, I woke up daily full of shame, guilt and fear over my lack of control around my drinking, and most of my behaviours.

For the first couple of seconds I might have peace, and then it would hit me like a thud of stone cold in my heart. “What had I done?”, “What had I said?, “Who had I spoken too?”…..and I would start to cry, before getting out of bed, trying to pretend all was well, that I was well and happy….I lived a lie, a constant, painful, soul destroying lie….

And in all those years of living my lie, all I wanted/hoped/dreamed of was to change my LIFE, – to have a LIFE.

Of having, Happiness, Love, Freedom, Peace of Mind, Self-Respect, Self-Esteem, a home that felt like a home.

A home that felt safe, secure and full of LOVE.

And as the exhausted Drinker, Binge Eater, People Pleaser, depressed and anxious woman I was back then, I didn’t have any of it….and I didn’t even know what having those joys would feel like, if I deserved them, or honestly, how I would cope or be if I did have them.

I wanted to be more of a woman, more of the mother my beautiful, precious son deserved, and I was less. Always less.

But I did try. I really did…..but I didn’t understand what Change needed of me, I didn’t know there was a foundation to change, I didn’t know the start point, the strong foundation, of any and all LIFE change, and so I stayed in sadder, lonelier place for many years more than I should have.

I don’t want the same for you, so please, I strongly advise you to read my message. It was my truth, it is yours too.

What do you want to Change in your LIFE?

Whatever it is you want to Change in your LIFE, there is one FIRST STEP, that if you miss it, makes Change a much harder, a much longer process and dilutes your forward moving, “I know I can do this”, success focused energy, into the slower moving, ‘I hope it will work” fear based, energy.

And that first STEP, is ACCEPTANCE, (in 2 parts);

  • ACCEPTANCE of where you are right now, today, in the very moment you are reading this.
  • ACCEPTANCE that what you have tried in the past, hasn’t worked for you and you let go of any expectation of it working now…..

When you simply ACCEPT where you are, and don’t waste a moment of your time trying to rationalise how you got there, who said / did what that lead you to this point in LIFE, you have the bedrock, the FOUNDATION of Change firmly in place.

When you simply ACCEPT where you are, you stop fighting yourself over your PAST. You LET GO of blame, shame and guilt – all of which keep you trapped in a time and space that has gone, and does not serve you moving forward…Tough talk I know, and if you want Change, you’ll take it on board and ACCEPT it.

You stop looking at what didn’t work for you, the process, method, that didn’t work. You stop trying harder to do what you know doesn’t work.

You ACCEPT that the process, method didn’t work, and you bring back your energy into looking at what else is out there, in different directions, at different perspectives, and you LET GO.

Of course your past, and your experience of trying, is valuable.

It holds the INFORMATION about who you were BEING when you were unhappy, fearful, anxious, in certain situations, and with certain people, and that information you can use going forward to future proof yourself. But that is all it is.

The more energy you spend on looking back, to times and places you cannot change one second of, the less of your super power energy you have to propel you forward to being the person you want to be, Happy, Healthy & HEALED.

I know from my own LIFE experiences, how exhausting it is to look back for answers to my Drinking, Binge Eating, feelings of Unworthiness to be successful, to be loved, and I never really found them anyway!

I also know that;

✨ CHANGE isn’t a random chance experience, even if it seems to be.

✨ CHANGE is a simple, self-aware, self-loving PROCESS, that gifts you back LIFE in the upper case experience it is supposed to be.

I know I am repeating myself, but it is important that you take this in……Change needs a strong foundation of ACCEPTANCE.

From there, Change it is a series of inner SHIFTS that allow you to go on a beautiful journey of self-exploration, with gentle curiosity, that will show you what you need, and the steps to take….and those steps will be very different, more compassionate, self-loving, self-forgiving, self-accepting, than you have ever taken before, and your transformation will be a source of JOY.

💖 You deserve to be Happy
💖 You deserve to be Healthy,

And both come through the gentle, loving HEALING that only YOU can deliver.

I am a Time Bender in the process of Change, I know the quickest way to LIFE Change, I know the steps you need to take, and the ones you don’t, and I can walk you through them with Grace & Ease.

If you are ready to LET GO of what holds you back in LIFE, to release the blocks to your Happiness, your Health and your deep HEALING, lets chat (HERE).

You are only ever a few SHIFTS away from Freedom and Peace of Mind, I promise you.

Be kind and gentle with yourself

Sonia x

5 Day INNER SHIFT Transformation Experience

All LIFE change comes easily when we SHIFT out of our current perception of any LIFE problem, and the smallest of INNER SHIFTS can start any transformation, instantly, with excitement and trust in a process we cannot even see.

 INNER SHIFTS open up doors in your mind and heart, they let in new possibilities and opportunities for change, they allow you to become unstuck in the places you need ‘unsticking’ most, and they release Stress, Fear, Anxiety, and allow you to end any unhappy habit, with an ease you didn’t think possible.

 I love INNER SHIFTS, they have changed my LIFE, and will continue to do so as I accept and leand into what they are teaching me, and my goodness, I have needed them in recent years. here’s just one instance, where I have let in a SHIFT, and am working it!

 I’m moving again….I can’t believe it.. Oh God

In October of last year I finally sold my house, after 2 years of wanting / needing /dreaming of leaving, and the ups and downs of hope, then disappointment, then hope again…..

The upheaval and uncertainty has taken its toll – it couldn’t not, as humans we are always looking to feel safe, and uncertainty isn’t a safe feeling.

But it also could have been a great deal worse.  And I am so grateful thank God, the Angels, whoever, that my journey to Happiness, Health & deep HEALING has given me the SHIFTS of awareness, that allowed me to create the tools to draw myself in, to reframe LIFE situations, to know, protect and honour my needs in a way that kept me SAFE then, and will keep me in the Grace and Ease of LIFE I need, to move forward.

And now I am doing it all again.  My son has decided it we are too isolated and too far from his work in the Met Police, and has found a shared house, closer to his work, his gorgeous girl, and the things he enjoys in LIFE.  And I am so proud of him for recognising his needs and acting on them.

So, less than 6 months after the huge move out of my previous LIFE of 17 years, I am looking at my NEXT BEST STEP for ME.

This was a good stop gap, and a huge learning curve, and I don’t regret a moment of the experience (there wouldn’t be any point to regret anyway, so…..)

And now, with only myself to consider, I am going to take what hasn’t worked (that I didn’t know wouldn’t work for me), and use my learnings to make better informed decisions about where I want to live, what I need in my environment to make me happy, all of which were my previously unknown needs, and that are now very clear to me.

Can you see how I have reframed this experience?

And how that reframe gives me freedom, greater peace of mind, ecomfort and support to me going forward?

I am not allowing myself to wallow in the costly mistakes – again, there is no point, and instead I am leaning into the Gift of the experience, and use what I have learnt as another set of powerful growth INNER SHIFTS.

It is the INNER SHIFTS that I have ALLOWED to take place, that I have actively looked for, and embodied that have grown me as a woman, a mother and a LIFE Recovery Coach.  I have evolved in a way I didn’t expect, and I embrace my evolution completely.

So, back to the important part of my message, YOU….with the deepest gratitude for all I have learnt, in the years since I changed my out of control Drinking, my Binge Eating, feeling Not Good Enough, Exhausted, Anxious and Stressed, to the Freedom of Choice and Peace of Mind and Heart I enjoy even on the toughest of times,  I have created and am running a powerful 🔥 FREE, 5 Day INNER SHIFT Transformation Experience 🔥, in a private FB group.

This experience is very close to my heart and it is my passion to change lives as easily and quickly as possible.

Commencing Monday, 13th March, my 🔥FREE 5 Day INNER SHIFT Transformation Experience🔥 is an event that includes;

  • Daily LIVE video trainings
  • Simple tools that SHIFT you immediately, &
  • Supporting worksheets to help you embed what you discover,

And the 🔥FREE 5 Day INNER SHIFT Transformation Experience🔥 will, teach you

  • Discover what SHIFTS really are, and the POWER of them
  • The ONLY reason any LIFE Change seems hard
  • Why you stay trapped in your Pain, and live a LIFE less than you deserve
  • How to recognise and SHIFT any unhelpful, THOUGHTS & FEELING Patterns
  • How to Create more Happiness, Health & HEALING whenever you want

If you are ready to go through a LIFE changing experience, and learn simple tools and strategies that you can apply to ANY area of your LIFE, join us! 

Here’s the link to request entry to the 🔥FREE 5 Day INNER SHIFT Transformation Experience 🔥

I hope to see you there, and in the meantime,

Be very kind and gentle with YOU.

Sonia x

The Answer is in “I”

The Answer is in “I”

Whatever change you want in your LIFE, whatever you want MORE of, LESS of, to be FREE of, the answer to your problem always lies in ‘I’ in the NOW…..

Not the usual ‘I’ of, “I can’t do / have / be”

Or the ‘I’ of “I’m not good enough”, and all the other “I statements you use to drag yourself down, to shrink who you truly are into a smaller version of you”

But in the super power ‘I’ of

  • I own this”
  • I am responsible”,
  • I am here right now, and this  is where I start”,
  • I can do this”,
  • I am GOOD ENOUGH”,

And all of the other ‘I’ statements that are your TRUTH.

“I” is the most liberating perception of your LIFE, and when you decide to you look with Compassion at  your past you cannot change, and with Forgiveness for what you did, or what happened to you, when you didn’t know you or your needs, you are on the road to true Happiness, Health & HEALING.

 “I” frees you from any other expectation, and from the moment you step into radical ‘I’, LIFE is easier, and change happens very quickly.


Because you stop wasting your valuable, powerful energy on looking at your  past  trying to rationalise others actions, on blaming others, on expecting others to change, or situations to change, of someone to save you, and instead, you take back total power and control over YOUR LIFE, with the “I‘s” of

  • I decide how to respond to this”
  • I decide to accept this (or not accept this)”,
  • I allow this person into my LIFE (or don’t allow),
  • “In this situation, or with this person I think/feel/act in a way I don’t like”
  • I am the only one who can do this, no-one else is responsible, or can do it for me”

What can you add to this list of “I’s” that will support your change?

 In “I” you have total control, total responsibility, total freedom, a great deal more head space, and you stop looking to any external influence to change your LIFE – to support your change, yes, absolutley, to be responsible for the change, no!


And this is so, so important, because ANY Change, whatever it is, doesn’t start with the external, the actions you take, but with the internal shifts that allow you to take different actions, with Confidence, Grace & EASE.

When you cannot place any responsibility on anyone else, you are left with YOU.

The beautiful, magical, tender, gentle, funny, kind and loving YOU that you may well have lost sight of during your years of struggling to fit a shape and size in LIFE that isn’t yours.

The wonder of YOU, that you have learnt to believe isn’t good enough, cannot change, cannot have, does not deserve….and I promise you my lovely, you are enough, you do deserve, and you can have any change.


And the truth for all of us is, that for any change, no matter how big or small it may seem, YOU are the only person, you need to know, understand, trust and LOVE for change to happen.


Regardless of what the presenting pain is with my clients, I never allow them to slip out of “I”, because when they do, they abdicate their power and potential to someone else.


By gently guiding back to the “I”, every time, my clients regain their power, and step into their potential, and their LIFE changes as they naturally start to have different Thoughts, Emotions and ACTIONS in every area of their LIFE.


I didn’t change my drinking, or my self-harm, depression or anxiety, in the first instance, through any external process, but instead through a change of my internal process, where I abaondoned all expectation of anyone else to help me, or me to blame, and put my whole being into the truth of “I” to move me forward.


And you know what, from that point, I started to became so empowered, that LIFE looked different immediately.


I made mistakes, of course I did, and you know what, I am so grateful for them –  and they were funny, silly, instead of the catastrophe’s of my past behaviours, and I learnt so much from them that move me, my practices, and my clients, forward, to this day.


I suggest you read this message at least once, and let it settle.  Then, go to your Self-Help books, and all the other wonderful resources with the strongest foundation of “The answer is in “I”, and follow them from a different perspective.


To help you make the changes you long for and deserve, I am running a FREE 5 Day Inner SHIFT Transformation Challenge in my private FB community, Happy, Healthy & HEALED, in March, where I will show you EXACTLY how easy change can be when you have a series of simple inner SHIFTS, and all start with “I”.


If you are ready for powerful change, the easiest way possible, with the fewest possible steps, join us, my past pain is now my purpose, and I would love to see you there


Be kind and gentle with yourself


Sonia x

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